Leadership and relationships often require humility as much as wisdom. In this reflection, Nathan Whitaker shares a story involving college basketball coach Donnie Jones and a simple act of care that became a reminder that sometimes the best way to help someone is by connecting them to the right person.
I recently interviewed college basketball coach Donnie Jones for my soon-to-be-launched podcast, and found myself remembering something he did years ago.
Donnie had a friend who was experiencing challenges, as we all do at various points. The friend wasn’t falling apart publicly or waving a flag for help. Just… not quite himself.
Donnie cared, but he also had the wisdom to recognize something important: because of their relationship and personalities, he probably wasn’t the best person to walk closely alongside him through that moment.
So Donnie made a phone call, connecting him with my dad, who has long had a gift for listening carefully, understanding people, and helping them feel seen without feeling judged. (Ironically, Donnieis great at making connections with others – this time, he chose to be the conduit.)
Sometimes we think leadership is that we have all the answers, or that helping means having the perfect words, the perfect advice, or the perfect solution. But often the best thing we can do is simply notice someone, care enough to act, and help connect them to the right person.
That takes humility. And wisdom.
We live in a world that can feel increasingly disconnected, even while we are constantly “connected.” People are carrying burdens we cannot always see. Quiet discouragement. Anxiety. Loneliness. Exhaustion.
We need to take care of one another.
And sometimes caring for someone well means recognizing that while we may not be the right person to help most deeply, we might know someone who is.
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